Making Time for Marriage

Guys, I know, like REALLY KNOW that I am not the only one who thinks marriage is really hard.  THE HARDEST THING EVER.  Jim and I have been married 13 1/2 years and will celebrate number 14 on November 1, 2017.  So when I say I know that marriage is hard, I really really do.

We actually made it through some really rough and trying times back when our now 10 and 12 year olds were babies, and little naive me thought it would be smooth sailing from there…but, fun thing, we ended up adding a new baby to the mix 2 years ago, and all those old issues (well, not all…we have definitely improved) seemed to resurface.  They were always there, they just weren’t so prominent and shoved in our faces without a baby to awaken them!

So, it’s been a struggle, we need to work on communicating better, and spending quality time together and as a family.  For me, I don’t want to be just ok with “ok”  I want something greater, and amazing and wonderful for our family.  I don’t want to just muddle through life.

I don’t want to just GET THROUGH this stage with Jack and then go back to complacency.  I would hope that this is our opportunity to make some really great improvements!

So, we’ve been taking some baby steps to make our marriage better, and, in honor of Valentine’s Day, (yes, I know, worst holiday ever) I thought I would share them with you.

  1.  Everyday, I make the bed, and while I am making it I pray deeply for our marriage.  I find myself tearing up almost every time, because, after 13 years of marriage this is the hardest I have ever prayed for Jim.
  2. We both share an audible app.  I subscribe for $15/month and we purchase a marriage book each month to listen to.   He listens to it on his drive to work, and I listen to it while running on the treadmill.  Even after one day, I felt a shift in our marriage.
  3. I am also listening to a book specifically for women called, “A Woman After God’s Own Heart.” and I truly, try to just remember that I am a child of God and my heart should be to serve the Lord.  This book may be a little extreme for some of you, but, it’s great to glean from it what you find to apply to your life.
  4. Something else I have done in the past, is to complete The Husband Project with a group of friends.  This is a secret project that encourages you and gives you ideas for one thing a day you can do for your husband.  I REALLY love this book and I have done it several times.  Every time I do it I notice a huge shift in our marriage.
  5. Cutting back.  I am a chronic Yes Girl.  It’s awful.  I say “yes” to everything because I hate letting people down.  I found myself gone every night of the week doing “good” things, while my family was falling apart.  This is probably a topic for an entirely different blog post, but I have decided that I cannot say “yes”  if it is not, “HELL, YES.”

I hope that you are able to find a tip that you can incorporate into your own marriage!  I know there are so many ideas out there and I really try to keep my ideas simple and practical!

What is something you have found really makes a difference in your marriage?

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